Filed under: notes
The real reasons employees leave claims that most of us leave jobs because we don’t get along with our bosses, connect with our bosses, or see them as real people. Thus the blame for employee turnover rests squarely on the shoulders of bosses (lucky bosses!):
Why do people leave teams and organizations? The number one reason people leave jobs is because they fail to connect with their bosses as leaders and as people. People are rarely honest about why they leave a company. Too many associates that depart follow Jimmy Conway’s advice (played by Robert DeNiro) in the 1990 hit movie “Goodfellas,” who told Henry Hill (played by Ray Liotta), “Never rat on your friends and keep your mouth shut.”
There is no upside incentive for the employee to be open and honest. Think about it! The primary reason people leave companies is because of the relationship and lack of emotional connection with their boss. However, it is almost never talked about in the exit interview. Why? Who wants to burn a bridge with a boss they may need for a future job reference?
It is easier to talk about work/life balance, moving on to build your skill sets, or the need to make more money. Salary is much further down the list as a reason to leave than what is usually reported in exit interviews….
I’m not totally convinced that most people leave because of the boss, but perhaps that’s because I’ve always left for other reasons (organization is closing, I’m moving, going back to school). What do you think? Have you left because of your relationship with your boss? Is this really the primary real reason people leave their jobs?
I have never left a job, and part of that is because I have a pretty good relationship with my immediate supervisor - not perfect, but better than average I think. Even if some hypothetical future boss were capable of treating me as well as this one, it would take time to build up the relationship.
A coworker left recently, citing her long commute and wish to work part time instead of full. Her relationship with our supervisor was much rockier, lots of communication issues and mistrust. I don’t think that was THE real reason she left, but if those issues hadn’t been there, she might have stayed despite the drive.
Comment by Anne P 03.26.08 @ 9:54 amI’ve rethought this a bit with your comment. I bet if any of my jobs had involved the sort of relationship you have with your boss, I would have tried to stay longer. Though when an organization threatens to close, it’s hard to stay till the end.
Comment by Ms. Theologian 03.26.08 @ 10:00 amI left the job I had for nearly nine years because of my boss. There were secondary factors, but they all come back to an incompetent manager. When I asked how I can get a promotion, he said, “Well, you’re the junior guy. There’s nothing I can do about it.” When I showed him US Bureau of Labor Statistics data that showed I was seriously underpaid, he said, “Quit looking at sites like that! Seriously, there’s no more money to pay you.” When I suspected he was upset about something and might write me up, I asked him if he was going to write me up. “No! There’s nothing to worry about.” The next day, he wrote me up. The final straw was when my father-in-law passed away. He sent an email to the group that I was going to be out for a few days, without any explanation. Then, the day I returned, he said, “Hey, where are you on your projects? Oh, and how was the funeral?” A month before that, he’d arranged a card, a collection for a memorial donation, and flowers for a co-worker who lost a parent. I nearly lost my mind that day, trying not to tell him what I really thought of him (since I was on some sort of super secret double probation, I didn’t want to push it). I quit two months later.
Sorry about the vent. Thanks for listening. I’m in a much better place now.
Comment by JC 03.26.08 @ 11:36 amI left one job because my boss treated me exceptionally poorly: I was expected to take over portions of her job, was regularly chastised for performing tasks that she told me to do (to the point that I started writing down what I had been told and requesting things in writing as much as possible), and despite being the one person in the office who could appropriately handle our order system was frequently “chewed out” (in front of co-workers) for not running it “correctly.” (What, exactly, was correct in this boss’ mind I have no idea. Orders went correctly into the system and invoices came correctly out of it.)
My sister worked briefly for the same company, in the same department, and she told me (six months before I accepted I couldn’t work with this boss anymore) that she hated the way our boss treated me and would have quit months ago had anyone treated her that way.
So, yes. That’s one job I left due to problems with the boss. But that’s one instance out of a list of reasons to leave jobs that looks like this: seeking better pay, moved, moved again, seeking something not customer-service-oriented, temporary job, boss issues, went back to school and moved, attending school full time (too many hours), attending school full time (terminated), moved, temporary job, current job that I’m still at.
Off-hand, looking at my record, I’d say I leave jobs because they’re either temp jobs or I’ve moved, not because I have issues with my bosses.
Um. You did want to know all that, right?
Comment by SisterCoyote 03.26.08 @ 11:42 amI’d say that’s another two votes (one and a half?) for the Boss-Relationship as a big factor for leaving, though my list is more like yours, Sister Coyote, with a bunch of reasons.
Comment by Ms. Theologian 03.26.08 @ 12:20 pmI have left two jobs because of my boss. I just couldn’t see myself working any longer with them without dire consequences to my mental health. Another I left due to my expanding family and lack of affordable childcare.
Comment by Tracey 03.26.08 @ 2:00 pmHmm, let’s see:
1. Changed jobs to one with higher pay and more hours
2. Moved
3. Evil Boss
4. Long commute, hated the work
5. Moved, also, hated the work environment and how it was changing
I think an awful boss can be an impetus to quit, certainly, but I would think the primary reason would be because the job itself isn’t fulfilling enough to overcome the other negatives.
Comment by GhostGirl 03.26.08 @ 2:18 pmI think a bad relationship with boss (and coworkers) can really tip the scale. I know people who have hung in there at not-great jobs because they respected and trusted their bosses. But a lousy boss (or management in general; it may not be *one* person) can make even a good job not worth it anymore. Having a good boss also makes it harder to leave a company or change departments because of the fear of ending up with an asshole boss.
Comment by h sofia 03.26.08 @ 2:59 pmThis is a tough issue. I have left a company where I enjoyed the work and believed in teh nmission because the boss refused to see/do anything about the horrible morale in my department, but I am currently staying at a company whose values I do not agree with, but I have a boss who tends to be able to “protect” us from a fair bit of those issues, and create a good interpersonal working environment.
Comment by BB 03.26.08 @ 5:32 pm[…] #1 Reason for women: Good relationships with manager and coworkers […]
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