28th Jan 2008
Worst Things to Say at Work
CNN’s Worst Things to Say at Work is pretty funny, and possibly not in the way it intends.
Here’s a short list of the “worst things to say at work.”
“That’s not my job.”
“No problem.” (if you don’t mean it)
“Don’t tell anyone I said this, but…”
“I haven’t had a raise in four years.”
“To be honest with you….”
“Whom did you vote for?” (Who remembers to say “Whom”? If we’re going to be really correct, it’s “For whom did you vote?”
“I got so trashed last night.”
“I just didn’t have time for that.”
“…or else.” (Who doesn’t like a threat?)
Now there are a few listed that sort of irk me in general. I tend to think that all statements beginning with “To be honest” should be stricken from the record (Are you lying the rest of the time?), but I’ve also caught myself using it. And, then there’s the weird grammar “Whom did you vote for?” And no one likes threats, as in “…or else.” or gossip “Don’t tell anyone….”
But then there are a bunch of sentiments in the list that seem to be necessary in some fashion, but are just phrased awkwardly: “That’s not my job.” “No Problem” “I haven’t had a raise in four years.” and “I just didn’t have time for that.” It seems to me that it’s important to understand exactly what your job is, to be able to affirm work that you can do, to state your salary history, and how much time you have for tasks. Perhaps not in those words.
As a prescriptive list, this is a pretty bizarre one. It seems co-written by the corporate overlords at Career Builder. No complaints! Suck it up! You’re either with us or against us!
It depends on who you are talking to. If you are speaking with your boss I think “I haven’t had a raise in four years, or thats not my job” are relevant.
Now, the To be Honest has a cousin, “Can I be honest with you?” That is when the speaker is going to tell you something horrible, usually about you. Run… run away!
That’s definitely a close cousin (a brother perhaps).
Did you read the comments on the CNN article? It didn’t go over so well.
So if you genuinely didn’t have time for something, are you supposed to lie and say the dog ate your laptop or something?
I suppose you could say, “I’m working on A, B, and C, but would LOVE to help with D. How would you suggest I reprioritize?” If you felt inclined.
I have noticed with the higher you are up on the chain, the less respect you have for others beneath your job level. When my old boss told me and other co-workers “Only people with Children get to have the Holidays off”, I just grinned and bared it and said “That is really thoughtful” even though I felt personally discriminated against because I chose not to have babies. I had family that was coming down from California and I live in Texas. I think ALL employees should be treated fairly. Us “Single” people do have families too. So my moto is “Grin and Bare it!” Bite your teeth if you have too.
I’ve discussed with the interns at my office not to use “dude” or “like/y’know” every third word. If you commit to a task and don’t end up finishing it, be honest: “X took longer than expected and I wasn’t able to make much headway on Y; I’ll have it done by the end of today.” Or the suggestion you made, Ms. T, works well if you know from the start that you’ll be hardpressed to get yet another task done.
Sadly, I find myself using “To be honest”, mostly as a way to keep my REAL honesty in check (ie, trying not to say “You’re a blooming idiot” when that’s the really honest answer). But they’re right–it sounds kinda silly.