Surviving the Workday

God help me, I’m perseverating on douching. I wish that I was researching the urban legends of douching, but unfortunately, douching with Lysol appears to be a real historical practice. At least I’m not the only one. Boing Boing has some more old ads about douching with Lysol.

One of the reasons I find old advertisements for Lysol Douching frightening is that there is still very little governmental oversight in terms of how beauty products are marketed. Mainstream beauty products contain parabens (linked to breast cancer) and pthalates (which disrupt reproductive functions). I think if we truly knew more about parabens and pthalates, we would find using them in beauty products as absurd as douching with Lysol.

Via Boing Boing

Myf sent me an article about this survey of 14,000 workers in 23 countries on Monday. I’ve been pondering it since. The study, What Workers Want, A Worldwide Study of Attitudes to Work and Work-Life Balance, by FDS, is most interesting to me not necessarily in what it reports, but in how the media reports it.

For example, in the results of the survey, we learn that workers in the United States on average (it could be the median, but I can’t tell from how it is worded) earn more than anyone else in the world. That’s not a huge surprise.

But look at what else is conveyed in a number of articles reporting the results:

“The chief of FDS, Charlotte Cornish, was surprised to find that Americans were fourth on the list of the biggest whiners. Americans make the most money of anyone else in the world, but yet they are so unhappy and want far more than what they have.”

This is fascinating, (and you may need to read one of the versions of the entire article to see this) because:

a. it is not the salary that workers in the US find problematic, but the conditions at work, including benefits, and the work-life balance; and
b. unhappiness at work, asking for more, and noticing flaws are all equated with whining.

Unhappiness isn’t whining. Asking for more benefits isn’t whining. Noticing that you have the longest work week in the world isn’t whining. But that’s how the article reads.

So while this survey was supposedly about workplace attitudes, the interpretations of the survey in the media all reference moaning and whining, including how little the workers in Thailand whine, and how much the Brits, Americans and French do.

It’s certainly part and parcel of the corporate party line in the United States: be grateful for what you have or you’ll be laid off. We can always outsource your job to somewhere the people are happy with less.

You can read other reports on the survey at Digital Journal, Docuticker, and Yahoo.

I’ve requested a pdf of the study.

If at some point, I’m accused of being paranoid about corporate greed and irresponsibility, and I go deep into therapy to discover why exactly I don’t trust many manufacturers of women’s “beauty” and “hygiene” products, I hope that I recall this image to justify my fears. (Click to enlarge)

Because they are recommending douching with Lysol. Yes, douching with Lysol. Really. It’s from an advertising campaign in the 1940s.

Via Boing Boing

I would like to find some free software to allow me to create a multiple choice on-line survey regarding attitudes toward work and flex time for people with and without children. It would be 20 questions or less, with a-d options, and hopefully a space for people to include details. If need be, I could also write it in True-False fashion.

Any ideas? I’m interested in your personal recommendations, not in what I can google.

Thank you!

Dear Ms. Theologian,

I am a single woman sans children. I am a hard worker and tend to work beyond the standard 40-45 hour work week. Why I do that is probably because I don’t have a spouse and/or children that need my attention at home. (The cat is pretty self-reliant, most of the time.) I do enjoy leaving on time and do so, if I feel I have caught up on my tasks for the day.

However, I am currently on a huge project where I have to do lots of work beyond the regular day-to-day tasks because of a badly packaged proposal which leaves me scambling to meet an unrealistic deadline and to pretty much lie to my client to alieviate his concerns about where the project is. That is because the big bosses and sales people didn’t set the client’s expectations well.

With all that said, today one of the bosses said something that really annoyed me. He is one of the heads of the company and has more of a vested interest than most of the line employees. Last year, he became a father for the first time. Prior to that, he would work long and late hours. Now that he has a child, he has scaled back his hours for a bit. So today he says to me something like, “I have a child who is going to be really disappointed because he is missing out on daddy time because of all the time I am spending on this project.” My reply was “I understand. I am missing out on ‘me’ time because of this project.”

Thanks for listening.

- Family Guilt-ed

Dear Family Guilt-ed,

First, a little known fact, Catholic guilt can actually be transferred through DNA. Ms. Theologian is not immediately Catholic, but a set of Italian grandparents is, and she believes this is one of the reasons she likes the eucharist so much. It’s really too bad she wanted to be a Catholic priest.

Now on to the challenge at hand. Ms. Theologian has three pieces of information in front of her:

1. Your letter and this letter, which allude to the disgruntledness of many people without children about the expectation that they are more available than people with children. In an informal survey conducted today by Ms. Theologian, all people without children expressed similar thoughts, though it varied by workplace (this is an important detail).

2. The fact that the workplace in the United States is staggeringly unfriendly to people with children, with laws that are much weaker than other “high-income” countries, and weaker than many “medium-income” countries.

3. This revelation by Anne P in comments, that although she is in the more privileged category (a working mom with white collar job with office with door), she is concerned about how her coworkers will behave about her need to pump twice a day in six months. Or a year. Or more.

Here is what Ms. Theologian thinks is happening: she thinks that because many employers refuse to address larger issues of flex-time that many people suffer. You’re suffering because you’re working long hours rather than doing your own thing. Your boss is suffering because he’s not home with his child. And by continuing to avoid the issue, employers are creating an Us v. Them situation. Your boss flexes his schedule and you end up doing his work. You need time to deal with a parent who is in the hospital, and someone has to cover for you.

It does not have to be this way. We do not have to behave as if we could not predict the fact that life happens. We know that people have babies, take care of children, get sick, care for ailing parents, care for sick kids, need mental health help, etc. We know all of this happens. But we do not prepare for it. Instead we cover for one another as if each time the situation arises it is unpredictable. We end up resentful, if we’re doing the covering, and scared, if we’re being covered.

Ms. Theologian thinks this is what happening. She’s not totally sure. But that’s how she makes those three pieces of information make sense. Also, you’re not imagining that your boss thinks your time is less valuable than his. He definitely does (though part of it is because he’s a parent and part of it is because he’s the boss).

On a practical level, part of the solution is to weather the storm. This project has fallen behind. You’re going to be putting in a fair amount of extra hours regardless of any insensitive comments. You might see if you can figure out a way to work with management to avoid this happening in the future. This isn’t blaming you. This is troubleshooting to avoid this happening again. That might make you feel a bit better.

Part of the solution is Flex-Time for Everyone, which simply won’t happen unless people (all people) find ways to ask for it. This means that once the project is over, you should make sure that you ask for (and hopefully take) the time you need to be whole, happy, and healthy. That means writing your screenplay, btw.

Ms. Theologian knows you’re on Eastern Standard Time and she wants you to go home now. You’ve done enough work for today. Really.

-Ms. Theologian

P.S. If you’d like to write to Ms. Theologian, send an email to ms dot theologian at gmail dot com.

My last post for Clock in for Equality deals with the challenges faced by people who are HIV positive with employers. In particular, the U.S. State Department denies employment to people with HIV in the foreign service no matter how qualified they are.

I think it’s fair to say that AIDS as a disease and as a public health issue has been accompanied by misinformation and misinterpretations, even (especially?) at the federal level. The U.S. State Department essentially behaves paternally by “protecting” people who are HIV positive by refusing them work.

You might want to read about Lorenzo Taylor, who has been denied employment in the Foreign Service because he is HIV positive, and is highly qualifed and called to the work.

Today is Clock in for Equality, a day of education about workplace fairness. Did you know that there is no federal law that bans discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people? And in many states (33) it is entirely legal to fire someone for being sexual orientation or gender identity.

Consider being an ally. Here’s one technique from Lambda Legal that I use periodically:

Demand a respectful work culture for all of your co-workers from all of your co-workers. Train yourself to “interrupt” homophobic, racist, and sexist statements and actions.

Similarly, don’t participate in or condone speculation or comments about co-workers HIV status or negative comments about people living with HIV.

Look people in the eye and make simple statements such as “Please don’t use that language around me” or “I don’t agree with that.” If you do not feel comfortable interrupting bad behavior as it is happening, you can talk to participants afterwards to tell them how you feel.

And here’s a list of events, one of which might be in your area. I’m a bit late with the list, but I just saw it on Lamba Legal’s site.

Today is Clock In for Equality, a day in support of workplace fairness for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people. A few statistics from the Human Rights Campaign:

In 33 states, it is legal to fire someone based on their sexual orientation.

In 42 states, it is legal to do so based on gender identity.

49 of the Fortune 50 companies include sexual orientation in their non-discrimination policies. (Exxon Mobil Corp. is the only company in the Fortune 50 that does not. And may they rot in hell.)

Interestingly, you can see that corporations have actually taken the lead in non-discrimination. I’m sure it’s good for business. Now let’s see if Congress can follow their lead.

The Employment Non-Discrimination Act is now in the U.S. House of Representatives. This act prohibits discrimination in the workplace by making it illegal to fire, refuse to hire or refuse to promote an employee based on the person’s sexual orientation or gender identity.

Write to your congressperson today and tell him or her that you think the Employment Non-Discrimination Act is of critical importance. I have written to mine. And I’ve done enough activism to know that the letters do not have to be eloquent, they do not need to be pointed, they just need to plainly ask for support of the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (and they need to be numerous).

If you saw the recent omnipresent photograph of Maggie Gyllenhaal’s breast taken while she breastfed (I’m not going to link to it), you can probably conclude that we’re not really okay with breastfeeding in the United States. And surprise! Women don’t breastfeed enough. And surprise! A class system exists to breastfeeding (or pumping) at work (wealthy women have more opportunities to do it).

The hypocrisy of our attitudes toward The Breasts are typified by Victoria’s Secret, who asked a woman to leave for breastfeeding. I don’t really have to point out the irony, do I? Breasts for pleasure for men? Okay. Breasts for their biological purpose? Not okay.

Britain, unfortunately, shares some of our attitudes about breastfeeding. However, a new law being considered in Britain would give women the “right” to breastfeed in public, as well as time for breaks at work:

Alison Baum, co-ordinator of the Breastfeeding Manifesto, said: “By
ensuring that employers provide appropriate work schedules and places to allow
women to continue breastfeeding, women could breastfeed for longer.

“Employers who are breast-feeding-friendly benefit in the long run
because the babies of those mothers will end up having fewer bugs and suffering
less illness. The parents will, therefore, have fewer absences.”

If companies had on-site crãches, women would take a break to breastfeed
their child but, more commonly, they would express milk and store it for their
baby to drink later.

Read the rest of Women May Get Right to Breastfeed in Public. Then try not to cry at the absurity of what women need the “right” to do.

Dear Ms. Theologian,

-you know who

Dear you know who,

The last person who asked this question was referring to a baby jesus butt plug, so Ms. Theologian is hesitant to open your document. She does not need to see that butt plug again. However, since she knows you, you know who, she will consider the attachment.

Ms. Theologian and you agree that what you are showing her is a proprietary survey of employee “attitude” questions, so it won’t be printed here. Plus, it’s lengthy, repetitive, and rather boring. Ms. Theologian also thinks your employer is not entitled to know what you think when you wake up in the morning, what you do outside of work hours, or whether you’re too exhausted to think when you get home.

Ms. Theologian is reminded of a friend in divinity school who couldn’t quite manage to get past the psychological evaluation in the ordination process because he shared too much. Each time he saw the psychological evaluator, he talked about his deepest darkest fears, his challenges, his growing edges, and just about everything you could imagine. In great detail. Consequently he could not get ordained. This is not to say he shouldn’t have shared, but to say that he needed to use judgment.

As do you.

This is not a friendly survey. This is a test. Withhold information.

-Ms. Theologian

P.S. If you’d like to write to Ms. Theologian, send an email to ms dot theologian at gmail dot com.

From a very timely article on China and Pesticides:

China’s farmers overuse pesticides, skip protective clothing and have at their fingertips an array of banned and counterfeit products, raising another area of concern in the country’s fragile food chain.

That pretty much sums up the concern with food from China for the Chinese and for everyone else.

It was the first week of the No China Diet. I wrote about my motivation, objections, groceries, clothes, and god help me, bra. I stopped short of going through the medicine cabinet, but I will say this: condoms are made in the USA, but pregnancy tests are made in China.

Also in the week, blog readership dropped off precipitously after a Ms. Theologian letter response about how your activities can be monitored at work, which indicated that most of you access the blog at work.

Don’t forget about Blogging for Workplace Fairness on May 15th. I would love to have you join me in your blog.

From Craig’s List, Los Angeles:
CASTING IMMEDIATELY FOR A NEW SCIENCE SERIES

——————————————————————————–
Reply to: job-324555140@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-05-04, 4:34PM PDT

A major cable network is looking for a host with a science background, who loves adventure and travel, is athletic, great on camera and passionate about the world around them. We are open to all ethnicities.

The ideal candidate must be someone who can absorb academic information, quickly synthesize it, and be able to communicate the science back to an audience in a simple and compelling manner. This series is a bit documentary style and a bit scripted.

If you are a man between the ages of 35 and 42 and are interested please include a picture and a resume with your response.

***

Right, a man. But of any ethnicity. How….generous.

I’m actually qualified for this job in all respects except for two. The penis thing, and the fact that I wouldn’t want to be on TV.

Honestly, BITE ME major cable network.

Scott at Boy in the Bands has a summary post of US clothing options, Buying US-made Clothing, so far, which certainly fits the needs of the No China Diet. (Pangea, The Vegan Store, is my absolute favorite, and has body care as well as bags.)

But I need a new white bra, preferably in cotton. Now that this rather intimate detail is out there, I can let you look at the expression on this woman’s face, which seems equally intimate (in a joyous sort of way). I feel like I’ve just seen some sort of solo underwear porn.

Facial expressions aside, I’ll mention that I did find a Not Made in China white cotton bra in Target last weekend for $12. But it was made in Indonesia. I bought it, and then felt exceptionally stupid the entire way home, because, of course, that’s trading one sweat shop for another. (My facial expression was a grimace.) So I’m taking it back.

Back to the bras from Rawganique. These bras are:

organic cotton (lovely)
available in “natural” (which seems like it might be “white”)
come in a range of sizes (also good)

But the sizes are small, medium, and large. There’s a reason most bras aren’t available that way. Because breasts vary. Even from breast to breast.

For $24, I’m wondering if I should just see what a medium looks like….

it’s time for a quiz.

When I interview people about their jobs, a fair number of people mention types of aromatherapy as a technique they use during the workday for calming and relaxing.

How much do you know about aromatherapy?

You can post your score in comments, if you like. I got 10 out 16 right. I mostly know rosemary, grapefruit, lavender, and sage. The rest…not so much.

If you’re playing along at home with the No China Diet, I’ve begun exploring the origin of clothes. Most of which appear to be made in China.

I’ve found that Sierra Trading Post, sort of a REI-flavored warehouse, lists the origin of each garment. Most that I’ve looked up are made in China, including J-41 shoes, which were my current shoe interest. Bummer that.

If you have places that you buy clothes not made in China, I’d love to hear about it. I’m also working on a short piece on used clothes, which I think may get me off the hook by not contributing a new dollar to China.

the first one comes for help in math
shirt open to his belly
I count the sprouts of hair on his chest (six)
notice his choker of hickies
and give him more work in fractions

the second has a crooked heart
that a friend worked into her skin
with a blue Bic pen:
she does not understand
subjects and verbs

sometimes I think I am losing
my touch for this kind of work
red pen in hand at the end of
a day I feel
unmarked.

-J.A. Krause in Going for Coffee: Poetry on the Job

You might also read The Poet at Work: Turning Your Day Job into Poetry

This post may exemplify the self-indulgence of blogging, because it includes my grocery list. As part of the No China Diet, I’m trying to avoid buying products from China, for these reasons, including food.

One of the specific reasons for avoiding food grown in China is the widespread use of chemical fertilizers and pesticides, many of which are illegal here. Another issue is that food shipped halfway around the world, which violates some of the principles of eating fairly and well. Certainly of eating “fresh.”

However, China has a booming organic market. U.S. corporations, such as Costco, and the USDA send representatives to China to check the organic conditions and then certify them as organic. But organic doesn’t always mean organic, exactly, because organic produce can be grown with human waste in China (gag). Trader Joe’s reportedly sells “organic” spinach from China, but I didn’t see any. Their edamame is from China though.

It would please me to no end if you played along in some fashion when you bought your own groceries and checked the origin. You don’t have to share the results, just play along. So, here’s most of what we bought with the origin noted.

Beverages
Seltzer (CA)
Organic Westsoy Plus (NY)
Cherry Cider (CA)*
Strawberry Juice (CA)*
Earl Grey tea (CA)*
Organic Espresso (Italy)

Vegetables and Fruit
Caesar Salad Mix (CA)
Organic spinach (CA)
Vidalia onions (CA)
Organic strawberries (CA)
Cantaloupe (CA)
Blueberries (CA)
Organic tomatoes (CA)
Organic carrots (CA)
Apples (WA)

Protein
Eggs (CA)
Organic Tofu (CA)
Tofurky Sausages (MA)
Smart Dogs (OR)
Canned salmon (CA)**
Salmon (Norway)**

Processed Things
Organic applesauce (CA)*
Organic polenta (CA)*
Salsa Fresca (CA)*
Artichoke Ravioli (CA)*
Olive Batard (CA)
Wheat bread (CA)

Items Skipped
edamame (China)
limes (Mexico)
Snowpeas (Mexico)

So now you’ve seen the grocery list. I’ll probably go to Whole Foods for more vegetables this weekend, but it’s easy enough to get something somewhat local and organic there.

*Items with a star were marked “Distributed and Sold by Trader Joe’s, Monrovia, California.” Hard to tell where exactly the ingredients came from, eh? That might call for some investigative journalism.

**Fish is for husband.

Laura Hawes explores the feeling of faking it in your vocation as well as finding your avocation in motherhood in her journey from Zen chaplain to mother in I was a Zen Dropout. It’s a particularly interesting spiritual workplace journey.

An excerpt regarding “faking it”:

Zen history is full of stories about young masters who, through reincarnation or religious genius, precociously tear away the veil of delusion. I was not one of them. I was like the thief in the Hindu story, who is stealing gold from the temple. He is about to make his exit when he hears footsteps. To save himself, he pretends to be a meditating sage, and the innocent person is so convinced by the act that they ply him with questions. He is a pretty good fake, and more people come to see him. The thief never manages to get away. He eventually becomes a sage, through the power of the posture he has assumed.

I was that imposter, except that instead of growing into my immense teacher’s robes, I recoiled from the act.

An excerpt regarding motherhood:

One day, after exhorting my toddler for the fifteenth time: “nice to kitty!” I found myself gripping her arms and screaming, “YOU HAVE TO BE KIND TO ALL BEINGS!”

It was an unpleasant sort of Samadhi, that realization of my inner Scary Lady.

Give it a read. You’ll enjoy it and may find it resonates with you.

UUpdater has written a particularly insightful post on Church with an Infant, which stresses how parents need flexilibity in their child caring options at church. I mention this post in this space because it touches on the issue of flexilibity in how we use our time, aknown in the workplace as flex-time.

Frequently, we assume that (and many employers interpret) flex-time is one thing or another usually involving children. But flex-time should mean that your time is flexible in order to care for yourself and your family. Any of these scenarios is actually flex-time:

1. You work at home on Fridays because your daughter gets out of rehab at noon and you want to pick her up.

2. You share care of a baby with a partner and work at home in the mornings and in the office in the afternoon.

3. You share care for your aging parents with a sibling and work four ten-hour days to have long weekends with them.

4. You work at home on alternate Tuesdays in order to see a therapist and decompress in the morning.

5. You work 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. because it works for you and your family.

6. You work 7 a.m. to 3 p.m. Just because.

7. On Thursday, you’re working at home in order to wait for a plumber.

Other ideas?

Dear Ms. Theologian,

-Weirded Out By the Thought of Monitoring

Dear Weirded Out,

Congratulations on graduating!

Ms. Theologian was under the impression that all the “kids these days” texted their friends constantly and that email was very old school. So she thinks your letter is probably fake. Nonetheless, she will address answer it in good faith.

God help us all because you should probably assume that that all of what you do at work can be tracked in some fashion, which includes work email, web sites visited, phone calls, even time in and out. A little research shows that employers can monitor your activities with at least five general methods: packet sniffers, log files, desktop monitoring, phones, and cameras.

Feeling paranoid yet? Or perhaps safe because you work for a small company or a non-profit that doesn’t go in for that much monitoring?

Ms. Theologian advises never saying anything via email that you wouldn’t print on a postcard (or the New York Times) for that matter. She tries this, and mainly succeeds. Occasionally, she fails. But it’s not a bad place to start.

She is depressing herself by writing this, but for a decade, she was monitored in both corporate and non-profit settings (depression is one of the consequences of monitoring). Here is part of what is wrong with monitoring. Ms. Theologian believes that monitoring and surveillance has a direct affect on her own creativity, which in turn undermines her ability to do her work. So she actually finds monitoring her activities negatively affects that all important God of Work, productivity.

Here is where the rest of the problem is (and she will attempt to describe it without going all Kant on you as this journal article does:

If you think of your work as a contract between you and your employer, you should be informed of any conditions, including monitoring, that will be imposed while you do the work. But few of us are. Which means we are essentially monitored against our will.

Additionally, arguments in favor of monitoring are always about “increasing productivity” and you know how Ms. Theologian feels about productivity. The very notion likens our bodies and minds to that of a machine. And we are not machines. We have hearts and souls and we love and grieve and cannot be expected to work as machines.

Now, Ms. Theologian has probably made you paranoid. But keep in mind just because everything you do is recorded, well, that does not mean a human being is paying attention. This information is stored for use later if you become a problem child.

There is a solution. To be on the safe side, you should not use your work computer for anything other than work. You should not use your work phone for anything other than work. You can use your cell phone for your non-work calls and texting to your heart’s content (just not near a video recording device). Go outside and do it on a formal break.

Welcome to the wild world of work,

-Ms. Theologian