I interviewed Ghost Girl (not pictured below), who manages large sets of data regarding underwear all across the nation. That’s right: skivvies of the United States of America. I had never noticed a proclivity toward underwear in our twenty year friendship. Sure, she wore it, but she didn’t seem particularly interested in it. She didn’t converse about. She sure didn’t study it and keep data on it. So, that prompted this question:

What do you find fulfilling in your work life?
I used to think my job was pretty stupid because I don’t really care about underwear. Here I was slaving away putting a bunch of numbers together for execs to spout off in support of making more money. Then I thought about it and realized, these numbers are really going to lower level marketing people, people who may end up presenting them to execs, but these people may have a proposal to turn around a struggling division, and these numbers will support that proposal that will get them noticed and give them satisfaction in their ability to do their jobs well. Basically, I am providing a service to poor schlubs like me who are just trying to get ahead.

For example, we had a major client come in for a meeting and we were explaining our process to them. These people were from a smaller division that was involved with a rapidly declining area–sheer hosiery. People just aren’t wearing pantyhose anymore. The industry has turned to a new direction–shapewear hosiery, which is undies and minimizing bras made of hosiery material and sold in the hosiery department (examples of Spanx.) We were able to show them how that particular data was classified, and the lights just went on. They were very excited to be able to show how their division was single handedly keeping the sheer hosiery category going. It went from “We’re frustrated because we can’t figure out how to show how well we’re doing” to “Oh my gosh, I can justify my existence.”

Also, I have statistical proof that male thongs are not big sellers, and if my data can keep abominations like that out of the market, it’s well worth it.

Amen, Underwear Queen. One can only wonder if that elastic band hurts.

But doesn’t that Spanx stuff also hurt? Just asking….

And congratulations for finding meaning in your work life, and for sharing the knowledge that I wear the most popular underwear in America. I, for one, am satisfied.