Filed under: notes
Dear Ms. Theologian,
Speaking of courtesy:
One of my direct reports sits next to a woman who chats a LOT. For instance, as of this moment she has been chatting with her boss for over 25 minutes. I can hear it too, but it doesn’t bug me as I’ve always worked in noisy environments. It’s not just limited to chats (not work-related) with her boss though, and it happens all day long.
He has mentioned that this is driving him nuts. However, neither she nor her boss nor any of the other people she chats with are in my department. I have mentioned this to my boss (who is at the same level as her) but I know he won’t do anything–in fact, he even mentioned it bugs him too.
My coworker says he’s just venting, but I know it really bothers him. He feels like their group gets public praise for doing a lot less work than we do. I did the empathetic thing, giving examples from my own career. I told him, we know we’re better than them and will go further because people really do notice the goings on. I’ve also said that I know how hard he works, and since I give the raises, I’m the one who counts. I praise all of my people publically every chance I get.
As his manager, I feel like I should do something more, but what? I am relatively new here so I don’t quite feel comfortable saying something to this manager, but maybe I should just bite the bullet? I just don’t think it’s my place, but rather her boss’s? Ack.
-Eavesdropping on Boring Conversations Isn’t a Great Use of Our Time
Dear She Who Insists on Finding a Great Use of Her Work Time:
First, you are challenging Ms. Theologian’s small mind because she loves eavesdropping as much as she loves chocolate. So, forgive her for not understanding the problem completely.
That said, Ms. Theologian is in favor of tactful directness. This means that she would encourage the employee to actually say something directly, such as, “Gee, Esmerelda, I’m having trouble focusing. Could you keep your voice down?” or maybe “Oh, that sounds like a terribly amusing conversation! But do you think you guys could take it to the conference room because I’m under deadline.”
However, Ms. Theologian also recalls that her directness has gotten her in trouble any number of times (The Great College Friend Fight of 1991. The Relationship that Never Happened because Ms. Theologian Hinted about its Possible existence of 1992. The parking ticket incident of 1992. The Don’t Touch My Ass incident of 1995. The We Can’t Have Sex Because You’re Gay, Remember? Incident of 1993. The I Do This Much Work and Should Be Rewarded Justly Incident of 1988-2004). Ms. Theologian is cringing, actually, as she types.
So, see if you can find a way to encourage directness between the employees. If not, perhaps a discussion with the manager. If not, then perhaps some earplugs? An ipod? Some nice chamomile tea for the co-worker? A seating assignment change? Any other ideas from readers?
-Ms. Theologian
P.S. If you would like to write to Ms. Theologian, please send an email to ms dot theologian at gmail dot com.