Dear Ms Theologian,

My job as become beyond boring. I literally do no work all day. Not one lick. I just sit there and stare, or read short stories that I have downloaded from the internet, or beg friends to give me projects I can do that look like work. They pay me a ridiculous sum to do this. Not tons, mind you, but more than at my old job where I ran around in circles. I suppose I should be happy–this is a dream for most people, to be paid to do nothing. But I’m going insane.

Last night I dreamt I had been lobotomized, and I woke up feeling like that actually has happened in real life. I’ve tried telling my boss that I have nothing to do, but he keeps putting me off. I’m not entirely sure he knows what I’m supposed to be doing. The thing is, my last job was the same way until they figured out what to do with me. But that could take years. Quitting is not an option–I need the cash and this is literally the only place to work in my field that is close by. Also, I like the people. I want to stay, I just want something of substance to do!

There is also a Big Project on the horizon, but I have no idea what my role will be or even when it will start. I feel like it will never happen. Meanwhile, I stare, and go crazy. And the people I manage do all the work. Any practical advice?

-Lobotomized on Longuyland

Dear Lobotomized:

Ms. Theologian has been warped by Tin House. She is forced to ask you this: Can we learn something from the short stories you’ve been reading?

As you describe this situation, Ms. Theologian sees it is with frustrated agency (no, not urgency,—agency, as in being an agent on your own behalf). You can’t get a new job, you can’t get help from your boss, you can’t find other projects to entertain you. You can’t do anything!

After some reflection, Ms. Theologian believes that you need to find your own agency. What does that mean? It could mean many things. You might find a project that inspires you at work. You might find that starting the Big Project in some way works. You might find a way to build a community at work. Don’t tell me that you can’t do any of these things. You need to find the solution here and its rooted in your own agency. Your boss doesn’t seem able or willing to solve it for you. And Ms. Theologian can’t do that for you.

But, fortunately, your psyche has been paying attention. It’s a bit concerned. And Ms. Theologian is too.

You’re smarter than you think, Lobotomized,

–Ms. Theologian

P.S. If you would like to write to Ms. Theologian, send an email to ms dot theologian at gmail dot com.